Mama's Boy

Since I wrote about Jessica on my first post, I certainly can't leave Travis out so I'll write about him today. Travis has "come easy" to me since getting pregnant with him...literally. We weren't even really trying yet and I was pregnant. The pregnancy was pretty simple except for the fact the his big ole butt was so big I could hardly breathe the last month or so! Birth was easy, nursing was easy. He prefered to sleep in his crib almost immediately. He wasn't a big cuddler, which I did miss because Jessica loved to cuddle. I stayed home with the kids until Travis was almost 2. He was then and has continued to be a big ole Mama's Boy. I couldn't leave him for a minute. He wanted no-one but me. Both endearing and sometimes quite annoying. Travis was such a good boy until somewhere between 2 and 3. OH MY!!! The meanness he would get into was so easily overlooked because he was just so darned cute and oh so loving! Once Jessica started school, he wanted to go to school too and couldn't wait to pick her up every day. He quickly picked up on basic math even before he started school but really struggled with reading and spelling. Once he started school, his behavior got a little worse but we figured it was just an adjustment for him and let it go. He was extremely impulsive though, which got him in trouble quite a bit. To make a really long story short, he was finally diagnosed with ADD. We tried all of the "diets" for ADD and did counseling for oh so long before we finally caved in to meds. What a difference!! We opted for a very mild low dose med because we still wanted him to be a boy and certainly didn't want him to be a perfect child. What would two ding dong parents do with a perfect kid anyway??? The art teacher and Travis haven't gotten along since day one and the old coot has continued to be the bane of my existence ever since! In kindergarten, Travis filled his pockets with little frogs and let them loose in the bathroom in art. Needless to say, Mrs. Coot (not her real name but that's the nice name I call her) calls me at work to report Travis's latest trouble. And I quote "Travis brought frogs to class today and let them go in the bathroom. One of the little girls in class went in after him and came out screaming. One of the frogs had even pooed on the toilet.......". I cracked up laughing!! I mean the fall out of your chair, rolling on the floor laughing! Once I regained my composure I said "Well at least it pooed on the toilet!" and cracked up again. Mrs. Coot did not find it at all funny and was extremely annoyed that I did. I promised her I would have a talk with Travis when he got home. I never mentioned it to him! He had two men for his Kindergarten teachers who thought he was hysterical and for the most part didn't have any problems from him. He is totally, 200% boy and I love him for it. He struggles daily with his ADD, even on meds. His behavior has come a long long way, but he has a hard time staying organized, staying on task, and remembering what the heck he's supposed to be doing. The apple didn't fall far from the tree; I see myself doing the same things every day! He is absolutely brilliant and scores very high on those god forsaken FCAT tests every year but he struggles with grades because he either does the work but loses it before he turns it in, or doesn't do it until after the due date! He starts middle school next year and I honestly don't know what in the world I'm going to do. Keith and I have always been very involved in the elementary school and have "outside" relationships with some of his teachers so it has been easy to keep up with both kids and make sure everything was going well. The elementary school is like something out of The Andy Griffith Show. The Principal is absolutely wonderful and most of the teachers are too (except for Mrs. Coot). Mrs. D warned me when Jessica finished 5th grade that middle school was a whole new world. "You're not in Kansas anymore" she said and boy was she right!! I keep trying to make Travis understand that the people at the middle school don't care who is mama is and I won't be able to keep bailing him out. Hopefully we'll all survive!! But even with all of his troubles, the two of us just "fit". I really truly don't consider him my "favorite", I love both of my kids the same, but Travis has always been easier. Jessica has fought me from day one and is a huge Daddy's girl. Travis has fought Keith from day one and is a huge Mama's boy. We were a house divided for a long time - but years of counseling, behavior therapy and drugs have restored peace to our home and brought the four of us together again. Travis still gets out at school every day and says "I love you mommy" - no matter who is standing there. By fourth grade, Jessica would have rather taken a beating than say that in front of her friends. I know she loves me, but Travis is a mama's boy and doesn't care who knows it! I'm already struggling with sharing him with another woman one day. I keep telling myself that I won't be like my mother in law and I'll be welcoming and loving and non-judgemental and make her my best friend.....and then I wake up and wonder who the heck am I kidding??? :)
I hope that I will be all of those things, but I know it will be difficult. My brother is still a mama's boy and he's 35 - and my mom thinks his wife is a total dingbat most days, but I know it's just because she took her baby boy away.
I have to end this by telling you of the "perfect children" my dear sweet hubby and I planned on having (Patrice - I already hear you cackling!). Patrice had two boys before I got pregnant the first time. They were typical toddler boys doing what all boys do, but in mine and hubbys mind, children should not do those things. It was loud and made messes and made people look at you in public. "Our children will NEVER....." - famous last words of a fool. Needless to say we have eaten our words over and over and over again. I have been stared down in Walmart more times than I can count. I've even told a few nosey newsers that if they didn't like how I was handling my kids I would be glad to let them take them home for a day! I've left buggies full of groceries in Publix because one or both kids decided to have melt down at the stinking candy rack during check out. Who in the heck dreamed up that idea anyway??? I had a woman in Target report to the cashier that a child was being abused in the mens bathroom. I happened to be standing there waiting on Keith and that "abused" child to come out of the bathroom and in full Julia Sugarbacker fashion told her that no, he wasn't being abused and if she didn't believe me I'd be glad to march her into the men's bathroom to find out! They've embarrassed the fool out of me by climbing all underneath the pews at church, or the best one yet, rolling down the window in my truck and climbing out before I even parked. He was so excited to see the friends we were meeting for dinner that he "just couldn't wait for you to park mommy". They've played chase in the middle of KFC. Hubby and I pretended we didn't know them and continued eating. We never leave a restaurant without half of our food and napkins on the floor. The sugar, ketchup, BBQ, napkins, you name it, were all considered play things when they were younger (and sometimes still are). And you know what? I didn't give two hoots cause it kept them quiet!!!! I'm sure there was a couple somewhere thinking "Our children will NEVER...." - again, famous last words of a fool.